Tarot Cards and Raman Noodles


I’ve been there.

Back in the 80s, phone psychics were a thing. You just picked up the phone and you could talk to a psychic (for a cold reading, Tarot reading, astrology, whatever you like). It was all well and good and usually left you with the fuzzy wuzzy feel-goods. Until the phone bill came. Dayum.

One time, I spoke with a Native American gentleman who was kind and warm and just as genuine  and wise as could be…which shows how innate intuition is for all of us. How else could a know-nothing kid have bone-deep knowing like that from a voice on a 1-900 number? Another one sounded like a very very cranky version of the  “go to the light” lady from Poltergeist. The first left me awed, the second left me completely cheesed off, and both said exactly what I needed (not wanted) to hear at the time. Those two conversations were worth the per minute charge. Others, well, not so much.

After all of that, when I started doing professional Tarot  I wanted to do it right. I wanted bring something a little more consistent and trustworthy to the Tarot Table than the psychic pals with with Jamaican accents had way back in the day.

Luckily for everyone, Al Gore, Steve Jobs, and Carnegie Mellon invented the Interwebs and 900 numbers became a thing of the past. That means ….online shopping! You can order up everything from car rides to exotic food to adult toys in all their full-priced-special-offered-shipping-and-handling-are-extra glory. Why not Tarot too? No more wonky “connection fees,” hotlines or phone bill surprises.

The Internet is the first ingredient for a Modern Oracle on a Raman Noodle sized budget. The second ingredient is as old as Tarot itself: card layouts. There are a LOT of layouts. People are writing new ones all the time. Some very old ones are still around and used all of the time.  The Celtic Cross is a good example. The ancient oracle tool of “card spreads” or “card layouts” is the perfect tool for making an above-board, up-front, transparent, trustworthy pricing structure for professional Tarot readings. The price per card is set to be fair to the reader. The fully up front pricing is fair for the sitter.

It’s simple. Never mind those time-gets-away-from you per minute charges. No need to worry about going a couple of minutes over that half hour and getting an up charge. Since they are as convenient for me as they are for you, all of my e-mail readings are all a straight flat rate, no frills $5 per card, Individual sessions are $40 each. Boom. Done.

If you have the budget and want some luxurious depth and detail, I got you. Get a 7 card layout. If you are on a college kid raman noodle budget, I got you. You’d be surprised how much a one card meditation, short-but-intense reading can give. 3 and 5 card layouts cover all the ground in-between.

Yes, Tarot is first and foremost about helping, empowering, learning, choosing, and growing. Tarot is about wisdom and advice. You can’t put a price tag on spirituality but you can support it with simple fairness for everyone involved: up-front, clear policies, reasonable prices, good selection. In short, all the same things we like about every other legitimate profession on Earth from the corner hairdresser to artists, writers, psychologists, counselors, clergy, musicians, and so on.

Fairness for both of us….THAT is what psychic friends are for.


E-mail readings anywhere, anytime

Click HERE to order from www.QuirkandFlotsam.com (That’s my etsy shop with Tarot e-books, meditation beads and other stuff too….feel free to browse!)

Secure Online ordering via Etsy Direct Checkout

Individuals or Parties in Pittsuburgh (South Hills)

412-206-9171 or modernoracletarot@gmail.com to schedule.

Some restrictions apply, please ask for details.